Making animal noises at my bf over Skype.

On a latter thought, I remember this summer, laying in bed and my body aching because of how hungry I was. But not really feeling anything because I had gotten used to it. I cling to that memory now...I remember the endless purging and the diet pills I took. And how I starved myself so easily, I admire my past self, and knowing I was at home, where if anything, food is more accessible is entirely inspiring now. I want that feeling again, just lying there because I can't do anything else. Feeling my skin cling to my bones, not fat. I'm done with this whole eating thing. Grr....I'm going to weigh myself now just to get it over with. If anything, to inspire me to actually try tomorrow instead of come dinner time, and I'm back stuffing my face like a normal person. I don't want to be normal, I want to be skinny. Uh....123.8 wow....I did not eat a pound of pasta. Maybe it's because I have to pee too. I don't know. I would like to blame it on other factors but I know it's just me being fat. Whatever, it's time to actually commit.